17. What “Caring for Mama” Looks Like in Real Life
Happy Suzday Everyone,
This month marks the 1 year anniversary of my online yoga community, where members have been going to meet the needs of their inner self, and resolve some of the aches and pains that come with getting older and raising young ones.
So, I’m raising a glass (it’s water) to celebrate the first year of Yoga for Mom-Life, and this week, I have a very special episode for you, in which I’m interviewing Kim Richards, my first guest on the show.
Kim is the founder of Caring for Mama, a line of care packages that are delivered to Moms around the U.S., filled with self-care goodies made by female-owned companies.
She’s on the show today so we can share how we’re collaborating on behalf of maternal resilience. I, as you know, am on the Yoga podcast and online practice side of things, and Kim is here on the things you can hold in your hands side of the equation.
Together, our San Diego-based companies help Moms replenish and thrive on all levels.
And, I think that there’s an inherent value to Kim’s care packages that can help us re-write the scripts on self-care for Moms.
Welcome to Yoga for Mom-Life. I’m Susana Jones, and I help lighten the load of early motherhood. With practical wisdom and minimalist yoga, Mama can get a break that gives more than it takes. Join the waitlist for my Fall-Winter season within a supportive community at yogaformomlife.com.
SO hey Kim.
Wanna tell everyone how we met?
Kim and I met at Hera Hub, a coworking space and business accelerator for women. It
Mothers as Moderating Variables
In research on child development, having a “warm, caring mother” is often described as that which enables healthy brain and socio-emotional development during the First Five years of their lives. In conditions whereby a child enters life in poverty, having a “warm, caring mother” has been shown to protect the child from negative outcomes later in life, stemming from things like living in poverty.
On a much larger scale, the UN found that healthy child development is key to achieving global sustainability goals. Without solid development during the first five years of a person’s life, they’re more prone to failing in school, getting pregnant at a young age, being more susceptible to disease, and having a shorter lifespan. All of these hinder our ability, as a human family to do what we need to build a sustainable future (United Nations, 2015).
In the absence of a “warm caring mother” or in the presence of a mother not described as warm or caring, it follows that there’s a disturbance in what would otherwise be healthy development for the child, and a more livable future when those children grow into adults.
A Child in Her Arm, and the World on Her Shoulders
Attitudes about mothers are comfortable with piling everything on Mom (just look at how we treat Mother Earth). But should they be?
By some metrics, the well-being of women is an indicator of societal health.
In America, it’s been opined that mothers are a social safety net that exist in lieu of socioeconomic supports for raising a family.
With even affluent mothers feeling the strain of raising children in the world today, while also caring for aging parents, how much more pressure can our safety net (mothers) hold before our chance of a healthy future stewarded by mature adults is blown?
This episode takes an honest look at that which helps us be the warm, caring mothers that mitigate the worst, and lovingly raise the next generation’s ability to self-regulate and maturely handle that which we can reasonably expect to happen during their lifetimes.
I am an optimist and a realist. Avoiding the worst outcomes of, say climate change, is possible. There are things for us to do individually and collectively, and I’m not even talking about composting this time :)
“Wait”, you might be thinking, “Me? I thought this was about what Moms need to do.” Nah uh. This, my friends, is not your Mom’s problem to fix.
Because we’re talking about the future adults in our society, and the eventual livability of Planet Earth, this is everyone’s problem, and I’m going all in on saying that if we take better care of Moms, we will have a future worth living for.
Where does Yoga fit into all this? Is for Moms to have time, space, and energy to do some. Why? Because it makes us less irritable, less stressed, and therefore more able to be the warm, caring mothers our kids and you desperately need us to be.
And yes, we Moms have our own work to do on this. We might need to be more selective over where we put our time and energy. We may need to overcome behaviors associated with postpartum mood disorders. We may need to heal our inner child to make parenting less triggering. And a lot of us are helping to change society for the better, and digging real deep to do all this while still being warm and caring for our children.
So the next time the Mm in your life is frigid or bitchy, just now that she’s hit the limit on a certain amount of effort she can put into life with the resources she’s got.
Imagine having a child in your arms, and the world on your shoulders. What would you need?
A warm drink handed to you?
A meal cooked by someone else?
A nap?
A few hours away from your family so you can decompress?
Or just knowing that someone views your success as everyone’s success, not just a show of strength, or a measure of your character.
Who knows that for humanity to succeed, you must succeed, and therefore they will ensure that you’ve got what you need to be a warm and caring mother.
Welcome to Yoga for Mom-Life. I’m Susana Jones,
Because being a warm, caring mother is essential to those aims, humanity needs to determine what enables us to be warm and caring, and make sure that mothers have what they need to fulfill their role to the best of their ability.
A Child in Your Arm, and the World on Your Shoulders
Empathy comes natural to some, but we ll have that part of us who wants to ask mom to do it for us.
So what I’m proposing is a big shift in the way we view our individual roles in the well-being of society and the planet’s future.
Interview with Kim Richards, founder of Caring for Mama, which creates care packages for Moms:
Hi Kim.
Tell us about Caring for Mama, and what kinds of things you include in these care packages.
The box is sturdy and cute. I see it being placed on a shelf up high where little toddler hands can’t reach them.
Me: Can I tell you how I hope people use these boxes? OK, so Mom is going about her day of doing Mom stuff. Someone, a child, partner, family member notices Mom looking a little worn. They bring her the electrolyte drink mixed into in a glass of water. Someone hands her the journal and pen while she’s folding laundry, and says, how about I fold these so you can take a break? Or maybe an older child notices Mom’s a little scattered. They bring her the essential oil, hold her hand and invite her to sit down with them and take a few breaths together.
This kind of thing, so it doesn’t end up like all the other self-care stuff we have in our drawers.
Caring for Mama, is different than self-care for moms. If that were sufficient, we wouldn’t be here Kim, but I think we’re both working towards adopting a different attitude towards Moms, where actively caring for a person replaces this assumption that moms can and should do it all themselves.
It’s easy to detect the socio-political undertones of self-care, and while yes, there’s a lot of that we need to do, there’s a layer of active caretaking of mothers that has no replacement in a physical product.
But we are a consumption-driven society, and we do have real nutritional and sensory needs, especially in early motherhood. And with the intention of “caring for mama,” these packages of well-made products from women-owned businesses can make a meaningful difference in the lived experience of motherhood.
So I love Kim that you have a physical product around which families and friends can rally in true support of the Moms in their lives.
And something I’m really proud to be adding to these actual boxes, which provide this nourishing, multi-sensory experience is a month of on-demand yoga, taught by me, inside my Replenish & Thrive membership community.
That is featured in the second-tier box in your line, which also includes _______.
These can be purchased for the Mamas in your life for the holidays. It’s a happy-inducing thing to receive, and again if a woman’s family is oriented to the box when they sense that Mom’s reserves are dwindling, it can do two things:
Get families in the habit of asking, “what can we do for Mom right now? She’s reached her max.” Just like Mom does for everyone in the family.
Teach our family members about how they too can self-regulate, take breaks for relaxation, and shift their energy to make themselves healthier and more positive.
So thank You Kim, mother of a ____ and ____ year old, for starting this company, and seeing Yoga for Mom Life as an ally in maternal care.
And, for all the local listeners in San Diego, Kim and I will be at _____ events this holiday season, repping Caring for Mama’s collaboration with Yoga for Mom-Life, so come on down. We’re lovely in person, and would love to see you.
References
United Nations. (2015). Children as a basis for sustainable development. Thematic Group on Early Childhood Development, Education, and Transition to Work. https://sustainabledevelopment.un.org/content/documents/6449100-Children%20as%20a%20basis%20for%20sustainable%20development.pdf
