4. A Summer That Doesn’t Break You
Hey Everyone,
It’s happening. The last days of school, changes to your childcare schedules, upcoming trips and all the things that make summertime as a parent completely different than it was when we were kids.
Now, whatever the next three months have in store for your personal and family routines, it’ll probably look different than last summer. So, it can be a new experience for you altogether. Yay.
But chances are, you’re so busy coordinating travel plans, time off, summer camps, and everyday stuff like work, that you’ve had little-to-no-chance to think about what you want to do this summer.
And although you may have retired your younger, more carefree self in order to raise a family, she’s still in there, and she wants more out of her summer break than one long road trip with no breaks and lame music.
So, let’s plan for a summer that doesn’t break you.
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Welcome to Yoga for Mom-Life. I’m your host, Susana Jones, and I help Moms of young kids who struggle to recharge because everyone else’s needs come first. With practical perspectives and yoga for post-postpartum, I show Moms how to make good use of limited free-time so they can live fully and vibrantly.
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In this week’s episode, I’m going to guide you through a little process to make this summer juicy and wonderful for you. Yes, we are responsible for other living beings who do need things from us around the clock,
But just because the summers we enjoyed as kids isn’t feasible in the same way doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy ourselves and feel like we also had some nice time off.
To accomplish this, we are going to use a framework known in Yoga as the maya koshas. According to this model, there are five layers of the Self, each one explaining a bit of who we are and how we experience life (Arora, 2019).
Together, they form a whole Self that is greater than the sum of its parts
Using this, we can identify one aspect of ourselves that we’d like to have some fun with this summer.
And yes, I am invoking the wisdom of the ages to help Moms enjoy the summer break they work so hard to share with their families. This is because parental burnout is common among families with young kids. For reasons including prescribed gender roles, women may burn out second to men (Roskam & Mikolajczak, 2020), but somehow continue to operate, at the expense of their long-term health (Swathi et al., 2023). And I think we deserve better!
So while it seems nice to help Moms get a little R&R this season, this is actually very important for everyone’s well-being. And practically speaking, it’s very doable.
You will have a great summer (and really, a great life) by considering these five aspects of you, and noticing which one wants something special from life these days.
I’ll list them, and you identify the one that calls to you. Then, we’ll proceed with next steps, k?
Physical body
2. Energy body
3. Mind & senses
4.Memories & beliefs
5. Joy & bliss
Which one is it for you? Remember, it’s there to help you. It’s there to help you, and I’ll explain how next. If you don’t know yet, just be with the question until it comes to you.
Before we move onto the next step, I’ll share that this concept comes from Yoga, a spiritual science, whose counterpart is Ayurveda, the science of life. These systems function best together.
In Ayurveda, anytime our stable routines get thrown off, our personal baseline of health and well-being gets rattled, too (Frawley, 1999). In the summer months, extra travel, schedule disruptions, hotter temperatures, and the like, can manifest as aggression, inflammation, and lower immunity come Fall when the kids go back to school.
Now, no Mom that I know wants more of these imbalances to deal with. We mostly want to chill, so here are some balancing recommendations that you can incorporate into your summer plans, your downtime, or time with your family to fill you up in a way you’ve been needing, but haven’t been sure how to do.
As you hear the layer of the Self that spoke to you, listen for 1 of 3 recommendations I give that resonate with you. And if none of these are quite it for you, bring in your own best idea for how to give this part of you the mojo you’ve been craving:
For the Physical Body
Hatha yoga - Yoga postures we do on a mat. It gathers the mind into the body. Reduces inflammation and stress. Builds strength and flexibility. Increases mental clarity (Arora, 2019).
Swimming - Takes pressure off your body and mind. Circulates the lymph to improve immunity and detoxification. Cools you off.
Dancing - In the kitchen. In a class. In the moonlight. To the beat of your own drum, or a teacher you like. Raises your vibration and makes a body sexy.
2. For the Energy Body
Cooling breath - sitali pranayama. Make a little taco-tongue, and inhale through it like a straw. Close your mouth and exhale through your nose. Cools off your insides.
Afternoon naps - Skip the hottest part of the day, and even just rest your eyes awhile. Softens wrinkles in the face. Mellows out your demeanor. Brings out your natural glow.
Singing - In the car, in the shower, while cooking, or out at karaoke. Stabilizes your mood, and strengthens your core.
3. For the Mind & Senses
Walk barefoot outside - on the grass, at the BBQ, on the beach, on the patio. Heightens your senses, and restores attention (Sewall, 2012). Calms inflammation when in contact with natural earth surfaces (Earthing Institute, 2024).
Smell the roses - Or whatever fragrant flowers are nearby. Grounding. Connects you with Nature’s beauty. Smells good!
Gaze upon Nature - Trees, scenery, the sky, the birds, etc. Restores fragmented attention. Calms the mind. Invites inner peace.
4. For Memories & Beliefs
Notice your self-talk - This one’s kinda heady, but it helps. Question the thoughts that drain your energy.
Reminisce - with photos, friends, or family. Take it way back to see how far you’ve come, and how you became who you are today.
Psychotherapy - Helpful guidance for changing difficult patterns and circumstances. Takes weight off the mind and body in remarkable ways.
5. For Joy & Bliss
Pampering - What makes you feel like a goddess. A nice soak. A massage, A nail appointment, hair cut, or facial. Do it up, and enjoy every second of it.
Yoga Nidra - Engages the other layers so that you can feel the pure bliss of simply being (Miller, 2010).
Delicious food and drink - Feed yourself dishes and treats that make you go mmmm. Share them with people you love. Feel the joy on your tastebuds. Practice moderation so you still feel good the next day.
As you can tell, there are many ways we can fill-up the various layers of ourselves to feel good and feel like ourselves, even when doing the tough job of parenting young kids. It’s not only about spa days, though those can help on a certain level. It’s not only about getting exercise, though that also helps.
What I love about this model is that it shows us what we can easily incorporate that works within the very real demands on our time, attention, and energy.
As a Mom who ties-in little strategies like this on a regular basis, I can attest to the life-giving effects of connecting with ourselves in this way. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.
For step-by-step instructions to make Yoga work in your life, join my online membership and a community of awesome Moms across the U.S.
For more personalized recommendations, book your first 1:1 Session with me, and receive a curated playlist of quality yoga videos and audio to practice during your summer breaks.
Thanks for tuning in, and sharing this show with the Moms you love.
References
Arora, I. (2019). Yoga: Ancient heritage, tomorrow’s vision. YogSadhna. pp. 29-40.
Earthing Institute (2024) What is earthing. https://earthinginstitute.net/what-is-earthing/
Miller, R. (2009). Yoga nidra: A meditative practice for deep relaxation and healing. Sounds True.
Roskam, I., Mikolajczak, M. (2020). Gender differences in the nature, antecedents and consequences of parental burnout. Springer Nature, 83, 485-498. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-020-01121-5
Sewall, L. (2012). Beauty and the brain. In P.H. Kahn Jr. & P. H. Hasbach (Eds.), Ecopsychology: Science, totems, and the technological species. (Chapter 10, pp. 265-273). The MIT Press.
Swathi, M., Manjusha, S., Vadakkiniath, I. J., & Gururaj, A. (2023). Prevalence and correlates of stress, anxiety, and depression in patients with chronic diseases: A cross-sectional study. Middle East Current Psychiatry, 30(1), 66. https://2p20few0d-mp01-y-https-doi-org.proxy.lirn.net/10.1186/s43045-023-00340-2
